Part 1: Stop Driving us Crazy!
There was a time not that long ago where I could get in my car and drive where I wanted to go and not need to actively regulate my breathing to prevent anxiety and fury from overtaking what should be unaffected situational awareness for all who are doing likewise. Those days seem to be over and I am deeply grieving those better days that had their fair share of traffic and infrastructure annoyances peppered with the occasional reckless or clueless drivers, but not to the perpetuation of what currently feels like grand theft auto where all other players are ported over from a zombie apocalypse for the blind. No disrespect to those who are blind zombies, but blind humans generally understand that driving a motor vehicle is not beneficial to anyone else on the road (Al Pacino notwithstanding). It’s really not ok and all humans need to be more mindful to do better (including me). Here are my recommendations for improvement and if you see yourself anywhere on this list, do better.
When did it become ok to just slow down to a slow crawl or stop completely in the middle of a major road, highway, or even quiet residential street? This is really dangerous behavior because your car and everyone in it becomes an unexpected and potentially unavoidable obstruction to what the road is designed to do: facilitate the flow of traffic. If you do this, what the heck are you doing??? Did you get a text you needed to read at the minute? Are you lost? Do you want to change the music or air conditioner settings? Are you having a stroke (forgivable, but still dangerous)? Whatever you are so desperate to do stop causing annoying and potentially dangerous obstructions to others driving on the road. Just pull the fork over, put your flashers on, and figure it out before continuing on your way. Come on, it’s not that hard.
This is a variation on item 1, but merits inclusion because misunderstanding signage and the rules of the road tends to lead to the above. Understand what road signs mean and follow them. If the sign means to stop when pedestrians are present it does NOT mean stop all the time like a regular stop sign. Are there pedestrians present? Then stop. No pedestrians present? Don’t stop. Seriously, this is not difficult to understand. If you can’t figure this out you are more than likely a blind zombie and should do better.
Know how to merge and how to yields and how they mean different things. Mea culpa on this one when my school age sons reminded me that the sign said to yield and I had inadvertently merged and cut off another car that was hidden by an infrastructure barrier. They rightfully did NOT let me off the hook and told me that if I couldn’t see because of the barrier, I should have stopped and looked before just humming along into the open lane. Ooph! That was decades ago and I’ve never done that again. So, it IS possible to change and my request for everyone is to imagine the two angelic faces of little boys in the backseat telling their loving mother she was driving like a blind zombie and potential a$$hat. I do better now and so can you.
Driving is especially stressful when your schedule does not account for unanticipated delays or constraints or other limitations that prevent you from getting where you want to be at the time you want to be there. Parents chauffeuring their children, I see you! Delivery drivers, I see you! Those seeking or providing medical care, I see you! There are many real imperatives that are difficult to control around travel time and obligatory demands. The only thing you can control in these situations is your plan to minimize the potential challenges and your response to minimize the burden of the situation on others in the event they occur. There is absolutely no excuse for not doing both. If you are supposed to be somewhere at a given time, plan your route ahead of time and leave with at least a 10-minute buffer to your projected travel time. Ask what alternatives are acceptable if you are delayed, what are possible contingencies? If you are delayed, pull over and communicate that you are delayed, implement the contingency plan and communicate your estimate arrival time with those who are expecting you. Don’t do items 1 -7. It will not help and may cause further delays (as well as harm someone else).
The other way to absolutely make someone running late mental is to not pay attention to traffic lights and especially left turn traffic lights. If someone needs to honk at you to jolt you out of your tic tock round up for you to actually drive when the signal changes to green you are a blind zombie. If your response makes it such that the other people behind you miss the opportunity to turn, you are an aS$hat. If you turn so late that you interfere with traffic coming from the other directions - or worse end up blocking traffic from the middle of the intersection so no one can safely drive around you, you should not be allowed to drive. Seriously! If you do that you are a pariah to everyone and do not deserve the privilege of driving among other people on public roadway. If you want to drive, go to a go-carts track where there are no lights to honor or a bumper car set-up where people can deliberately crash against your car to knock some sense into you. Pay attention to lights and stop causing more stress to others on a schedule. Super bad karma.
Eliminate - or at least minimize - the extent to which you drive under the influence of alcohol, drugs, social media, your phone, other passengers or other drivers. This seems obvious but it bears restatement nonetheless because we all end up doing it at some point or another, either inadvertently or deliberately. It really isn’t safe to operate a moving vehicle when your brain is not functioning well. Doing so is not being your best self. This is when you phone a friend, family member, or ride share driver. Do it. Don’t risk your own life or that of others.
See Part 2: Stop Driving Us Crazy!
